Anna faris house bunny i gotta meet this bird

anna faris house bunny i gotta meet this bird

"I have not followed my House Bunny work-out regime since the movie wrapped," And my character says, “I've got to meet this fricking bird!. I gotta meet this frickin' bird! - The House Bunny Quotes | Watch, share, meme and Dub all the quotes | Dubsmash. Anna Faris. 13 Videos. "I gotta meet this. Shelley: I gotta meet this freakin' bird! Shelley: [while reading a letter] Dear Shelley. Oh my gosh, that's me! Wait there's more! Natalie: This is Harmony.

They're kicking me out? Maybe it's because of your age. But that's 59 in Bunny Years. You given any thought to who you might be voting for? I definitely won't listen to what Simon says, he is just so mean. I usually always agree with Paula and Randy. Oh, you meant the president. My heart is pounding like a nail! My allergic reaction made me feel beautiful. I'm an expert at parties and boys! Men write to me from prison, sometimes even in their own blood, which I think is theirs, but I don't know, I'm really nervous because I really want to help.

You mean, like, centerfold? Don't mess with me. Don't mess with Phi Iota Mu. Natalie, Colby was following you around like a puppy dog. Do you guys think you'll, you know I do not think, you know, THAT.

Natalie, are you a virgin? Am I a virgin? It's like an amphitheater in here. We have to have an Aztec party. We always wanted to have one at the mansion but we could never find a virgin to sacrifice.

It's been so nice meeting you. Make love to the camera. I saw that in Austin Powers. Think, really sexy witch. Are you a good witch or a bad witch? Oh, Mona, that guy is totally checking you out. Think of it as research, Mona. Get on that horse! You like what you see, stud? I'm not really sure what I'm looking at, metalface. Let me guess, is it a Hannibal Lecter thing?

There's a big box of cutesicles. Carrie Mae, go work your magic. The only magic I've ever done was try to figure out a way to stay in college for nine years and not go back to my trailer park in Idaho. So, figure out a way into his heart. Just go over there and talk to him about any old thing. Excuse me, you know where the crapper is? I have to drop off some timber. It's just, Carrie Mae, sometimes men like their women with a little bit of mystery.

So, get back over there and try it again. You know where the crapper is? I have to do a very mysterious thing in there. Drop off some timber. I'm definitely not drunk enough for that.

Well, this is good, though. This is really good practice. Hey, it's the Zetas. I feel like we never see you guys out.

We never see them out, either. I met you yesterday. I was that homeless girl. Now I'm their house mom. So, hey, you guys got here just in time. We're doing a little karaoke contest. Yeah, you guys can go next if you want. Always say "yes" to karaoke. Yeah, we'll pick a great song for you. Don't worry, you can't be any worse than we were. Just give me a second. I promise the Zetas are going up on stage. You guys, karaoke is so fun! You gotta get up there and do karaoke. I think we can do it.

We can do anything better than those mannequins, you guys. I might puke, but let's do it! Get up there, you Bravehearts!

All right, that was Kappa Eta Sigma! Next up, the Zetas? Singing Like A Virgin. I made it through the wilderness Somehow I made it through Didn't know how lost I was Until I found you I was beat, incomplete I'm a hag and I'm fat and rude But you made me feel Yeah, you made me feel Like a big bag of poop Like a loser We're rejected all the time Like a loser Who's so retarded, it's a crime Like a That was not nice.

You wanna get cut, bitch? No, no, no, no, she's right, Courtney. I mean, we should apologise. Especially since we're about to take their house. Well, we heard that you were losing your charter, so Phi lota Mu is gonna buy your crappy house when it goes on sale after rush. Yes, we are going to have so many pledges, we'll need all of the extra space.

Oh, but don't worry. I mean, we'll still let you guys stay on and be the maids. You can sweep the chimney. Won't that be nice? Does the little one understand human talk? Oh, and I guess that when we buy your house, you'll go back to being homeless.

A Zeta housemother, and I don't like some of the things you were saying. Because they do understand human talk, and you hurt their feelings. Oh, Shelley, come on. It's not worth it, let's go. Yeah, you should go.

It was so nice to see you. But I really think that That was so humiliating, you guys. I know it was awful. And I am so mad that they did that to you guys, but we can't listen to those girls. Oh, we're not losers. You just ignore that dumb old wall. Well, you're not a loser, Shelley. I just don't understand that kind of behaviour. You guys, I can make you way hotter than any old Phi lota Mu. By the time I'm done, every girl on campus'll want to pledge Zeta.

anna faris house bunny i gotta meet this bird

No, really, we are just a bunch of misfits. Lilly just texted me from the closet. She says we're not misfits. Well, I hope she was being ironic. Go, go, go, go, go!

You can do this. If I thought you all were quitting My heart would just fall out of my head. Shelley, your heart is not in your head. Your heart has its own cavity. Right under your fake boobs.

Do you understand how moronic you sound when you say your heart is gonna fall out of your head? Well, Mona, I totally understand why that saying sounds mixed-up, but I don't mean it for real. I don't think that my heart is in my skull. What I mean is that sometimes logic tells you to do something, but you have to have part of your heart in it as well.

anna faris house bunny i gotta meet this bird

My head and my heart tell me that we can save Zeta. We need 30 pledges, and I know just how to do it. By making you guys the hottest girls on campus. There's no way those bitches are getting our house.

Okay, ladies, dressing sexy is all about skimplifying. I want you to show skin in the four major regions. Arms, legs, belly and cleavage. Is this how you skimplify? Well, maybe we could let someone who doesn't have a giant baby in their belly give it a try.

Okay, this is your most important secret weapon, the water bra. Just stay away from sharp corners. This is going too far. Just consider it like another thesis topic, you know? Because feeling good on the inside is all about looking good on the outside.

Go ahead and keep that one. There are three rules to successful flirtation. Eye contact, flattery and lots of touching.

For example, let's pretend that Natalie here is a man. I'm touching his arm, I'm looking deep into his eyes and I'm wearing deodorant. And I might say something like this.

Your biceps are huge. What do I do with my chew? How long would the kiss usually be? And, also, why would he kiss you, because you Okay, ladies, today's lesson is makeup. First, we must highlight your eyes. The eyes are the nipples of the face. So this is what it feels like to not be invisible. We weren't exactly invisible before, just the anti-hot. I really like what you've done with the Bedazzler. So what's next, Shelley? I want all the fraternities to see how hot you guys are. Kind of like a coming-out party.

So we are gonna take some pictures. Oh, we are not posing for Playboy. No, in a calendar. Hey, you guys, Lilly just texted me. She says we look hot and this is fun. Keep doing that, keep doing that. Make love to the camera. I saw that in Austin Powers. Think really sexy witch. I think you're a bad witch. I bet the house that falls on you is gonna be a sexy house. You're like a supermodel, except more pregnant.

Okay, Henry, very glad you finally learnt how to use the suggestion box. And I want to let you know that I got your message, you want less Boggle and more bingo. So I'm gonna work on it, okay?

The House Bunny () - Anna Faris as Shelley Darlingson - IMDb

Okay, what's going on with your heart? We brought a donation as part of our philtrophy. We're making calendars, and before we could even get them all out, the printing-press guys bought up the first batch. Great, thank you very much. This is, "Pay to the Order of Old People. I hope you don't mind, but I brought a few extra volunteers to help out today. Henry, Henry, look away. Look at the wall. Think of broccoli and bad bingo cards. You know, actually, your timing is perfect, because I was about to try and organise a dance class.

And I was at the top of the list not signing up. There ain't no way I'm dancing. You can forget that. Oh, I love to dance. Well, let's do it. Okay, ladies, fan out and find a partner. And maybe we should talk about this music.

Wow, this music is super, super-great, but we might want to try something a little sexier. Shelley, I just want to thank you so much for doing this. It's just so kind. Oh, well, kindness is just love with its work boots on. Hey, Oliver, ask the girl to dance. So, listen, Shelley, I was wondering if maybe you'd like to have dinner sometime. Oh, it's all good. I'm so glad to be back. Marvin, tell Shelley we're back and we're gonna be watching a movie. How about something spooky?

No, you guys, I think it should be Shelley's pick tonight. Mr Hefner, Shelley's actually gone. She told me to give you this letter. Shelley moved to Africa to work with the orphans.

anna faris house bunny i gotta meet this bird

She left while we were gone because she says she can't deal with goodbyes. I'm going to bed. I don't like when you look nervous. You will not blow this! But I just wanna mix drinks. You know, my whole life, that's all I've ever wanted to do, is just blend. And then you come along with your weird kryptonite death grip, and Oh, sweet bastard, that's good.

That's right, and I'm the only woman that can make you feel like that. You will not tell Hef that we wrote that letter to Shelley.

Anna Faris: Shelley Darlingson

So I got it. I'll take two calendars. Everyone's been buying two. Actually, it's in case one gets ruined. Hot dogs, Zeta hot dogs. We should totally have a mixer with you guys sometime. We could have one with Battle We could have a Battlestar Galactica night. She said that you guys should get together some night, with pudding. At Phi lota Mu we are very exclusive, because we can be.

Many of our sisters are leaders on campus. We have a rocking GPA and our very own Korean manicurist. Hey, where are you guys going? Why would they have a booth? And who would go to it? I can totally hose you some right there. Go ahead, lean back. Where are the Zetas? We are the Zetas, edition. And I'm in love! Why'd you do that? I needed to hurt someone.

This is so awesome, you guys. That was so much fun! It was, it was. Harmony, Brian Stone was all over you, girl.

I got numbers from four boys. It was all for research. Well, Natalie, Colby was following you around like a puppy dog. Do you guys think you'll, you know I do not think, you know, that. Natalie, are you a virgin? Am I a virgin? It's like an amphitheatre in here! We have to have an Aztec party. We always wanted to have one at the Mansion, but we could never find a virgin to sacrifice.

Natalie, it is gonna be the best time ever. We are gonna have the most rockingest party, and then we'll get our 30 pledges.

Okay, quick trick, watch this. We are gonna put little trails of Vaseline on the contours of our abs, mist it a little, and that way the light will catch our tans. Oh, she says you're completely ingenious, Shelley.

That's the same as vapid, right? Oh, it's better than vapid. It's a shame nobody'd be able to see it, you know, under my brace. Well, when can you take the brace off? Well, it's a good thing I asked. No, I'm so fine. I mean, you know, it's all indented into me and, you know, if I took it off, I wouldn't even know what would possibly happen, and my spine could be like a noodle.

And then one day a boy, Howard Rubenstock, snuck up behind me and tore it off my face. No, that I was wearing it upside down. I'm not really sure what you're trying to tell me, Shelley. But the point is, you're a butterfly now, not an earthworm.

You don't need to hide any more. So, okay, here he comes. He runs past here every day, and I've seen you staring at him. I can tell that you like him and that you want to talk to him. Go invite him to our party. I didn't know you ran. Sure, I mean, I do now.

You're pretty pleased with yourself, aren't you? Oh, you scared me. My heart's pounding like a nail. I guess I am a little proud. Well, don't get too used to that feeling. Because there's no way that I'm going to let a whorey little tart like you stand in the way of the Phi lota Mu.

Don't mess with me. Don't mess with Phi lota Mu. Someone needs a mani-pedi massage combo, pronto. Steve said he's gonna come to the Aztec party.

Steve, he's gonna come. This is gonna be so much fun! You guys, I did it, I can bend! So, "Because you like my boobs, "would you stand there and let me go like this Anybody want some chips? Yeah, have chips while you party. So, Miss December, you got your bikini on under there? No, actually, just my fake water Natalie, there you are. Oh, Bobby and Zach from Kappa are just dying to meet you.

I'm sorry, Colby, but Natalie is a very hot commodity. I have, like, the world's hugest crush on him. So I don't really Then we need to let him see how in demand you are. Always remember, boys want what other boys want. That's a cute costume, Lil. I was gonna ask you this, because I've been seeing these all over. I mean, this is an Aztec party, which is like miles away, as you probably know, in Polynesia.

Boys don't like girls that are too smart. God, I hope Colby didn't hear me say that. Shelley, you really know all the tricks. How do you do it, you know? I mean, with Colby here and with Oliver asking you out, it's like we might both lose our virginity this year. It's supposed to be a mixer. There's no one here to mix. They're over there, aren't they? Well, they're definitely not here. I know that, dipswitch.

I can see that. And now, let the sacrificial rites begin! It's time for this virgin to get sacrificed in the boiling Jell-O lava! This is Aztec Night, the first of many awesome Zeta parties to come. And for those of you girls going through rush, remember to make Zeta your number-one choice! The time is now.

I've never seen anybody get sacrificed before. That was so hot. I mean, I don't know anything about Aztecs, you know? But, I mean, I do know that I had fun.

I don't know anything about them either, so that's awesome. What have the Zetas become? Okay, okay, he's here. Wow, you look great. And that's not the only thing I like. You have a wide range of interests? Oh, wait here for a second. I think I dropped some money over here the other day. I just don't know wherever could it be. Maybe it's over here by this manhole. I just went over there to look for my money which I had dropped the other day. I think it was a dollar coin, because I heard a clanging.

Who knew steam can be hot? I wonder what they did when Marilyn Monroe did it. They probably added soothing botanicals to the steam rising from the manhole. I like that word.

What can I get you guys? Instead of the mahi-mahi, may I just get the one mahi, because I'm not that hungry? The chicken piccata for me. Yeah, that'd be fine. Or "the Spanish Armada. I'd show you, but who really wants to see my butt? I mean, it's just a silly old butt with no tan lines. Wow, this was really good food. I hope it doesn't go straight to my butt. I mean, I think my butt would still be a pretty good one, though.

Oh, well, this has been fun, but we should probably wrap it up, because I've got another date at Well, what's a girl in demand going to do? Yeah, well, dinner's on me. I'm gonna get going. I wouldn't want you to keep the other guy waiting. Your biceps are huge! I don't think he likes me. He didn't fall for any of my tricks. That's impossible, your tricks always work. I did sexy, I did "other guys want me. But I don't know, he just stared.

What if Oliver is one of those guys who wants to have, like, a conversation with a girl before he hooks up with her? No, he's not gay. Oh, I don't know. I'm just saying, you know, maybe he wants to talk first. What if Oliver doesn't mind a smart girl? So I have to learn things about things and stuff? You can do that. You can do anything you set your mind to, Shelley. But you can't even tell I have boobs.

Well, don't you think I should show him a little something? Give him a little philanthropy? You're still too sexy.

Nat, what if she wears your glasses? Natalie, you should really go to an eye doctor. That's actually how I got those glasses. So have you called Oliver yet? He didn't seem too excited to be going out on a second date, but he said yes, so here goes. Now remember, just be yourself, only different. Talk about politics and religion.

That's always a really good first-date topic.

anna faris house bunny i gotta meet this bird

A nuclear non-proliferation treaty should ease tension in Asia. Well, that's my thought. These glasses don't make me dizzy or anything. Well, you seem to know a lot about North Korea and the Middle East. It sounds like you really read the paper. Oh, all the time. I am just nuts about the paper. So, have you given any thought to who you might be voting for?

I'm not sure yet. I definitely won't listen to what Simon says.

anna faris house bunny i gotta meet this bird

He is just so mean. I usually always agree with Paula and Randy. Oh, you meant the President of the United States. The United States of America. Fifty states, if you include Hawaii. Can I get you anything else? No, I think we're good, thanks. Hey, I know where I know you from.

You were in Playboy. Those girls are all boobs and no brains. I'm too busy in a library, reading books with dust on them. Can you believe it? I'm still hungry, even though we just ate.

The House Bunny (2008) - Sexy Car Wash Scene (4/10) - Movieclips

Oh, my gosh, I can't believe I did that. Are those index cards? They're not index cards with writing on them. Let me get some more napkins. I can't believe that happened. I'm sorry about all the gravity. Are you all right? I need to go. Come on, Puffin, you've been in here for days. Let's watch a movie, it'll make you feel better. I don't get it. Why would Shelley just leave? It's for the best. I used to hear her crying in her room late at night.

I think I'd like to be alone for a bit. I could stay with you. No, just bring me more ice cream. What have I done to poor Shelley? You're not gonna tell him, are you? I'm gonna be the next Miss November, not that little blonde bitch. You found my weakness, used it against me like kryptonite, but that's never gonna happen again. First up, Kristen Withers. Pre-med, family in Greenwich. We just made our first pledge acceptance. Next up, Jill Palmer. Her father owns, like, half of Aspen.

Why am I such a yummy dummy? English major from Florida. But she does drive a Porsche. I just don't know about this one. I kind of feel like we've created this image.

I just don't feel like she's gonna fit in. I'm just saying, she should have spent the Porsche money on a nose job. She said she broke it in a skiing accident last year, and I'm like, "Okay, I'm sure the nose surgeon would take the Porsche as a trade-in.

Hey, Shelley, it's me. Oh, is this you? Like, I can't believe you're calling me. How is everybody at the Mansion? I'm gonna make you next month's centrefold. You're making me Miss November? Are you totally serious, or is this not Hef? If this is Hef, blink once. If it isn't Hef, blink twice.

I'm so glad you haven't changed, Shelley. And I want you to move back to the Mansion. It's just not the same without you here. Hef, I just can't believe it. Okay, here's what happens. We shoot the pictorial, we'll have you do a city tour of the United States. And then from there we're gonna travel Europe, ending with a one-week stay in Monaco. We're gonna coordinate your pictorial with a Playboy Channel documentary on the life of a centrefold. The exposure's going to be wonderful, but it doesn't stop there.

We're going to pull out all the stops for this one, Shelley. It's going to be huge. Hef, I'm so sorry. I'm so happy that you called me. And I love you, but I don't think I can do it. I can't leave my Zeta girls. I'm not going anywhere. Sociology major from India. I remember this one. She seems kind of weird. I actually got that, too. Not like an "I live in the wall and eat crickets" kind of weird, but just like a little off. Look at you people! Honestly, is this really what you've become?

Judging other girls on their appearance? I'm sure glad I joined when I did, because honestly, I don't think I would make the cut these days. And neither would a lot of you. I can't believe that Zeta's become just like Phi lota Mu. A bunch of snooty bitches! This is all your fault. You know what, Mona? It all started with this fake hair and your stupid water bras.

Before you got here, we were individuals. You've turned us all into stupid bimbos. Come on, stop, stop. I understand, and I'm sorry. Thank you guys for everything. I'm gonna go, and I really hope to see you guys in the future.

Hi, Hef, it's Shelley. I was just kidding, silly. I can't wait to be back at the Mansion and be a centrefold. This is the happiest day of my life.

Dear Oliver, I'm so sorry I couldn't tell you this in person. It was way too embarrassing to face you after everything. I am leaving the Zeta house to fulfil my lifelong dream.

And I know that what I've decided to do won't make any sense to you at all, but I have joined the Peace Corps, and I'm going off to work in the mountains of a country called Peru. I'm going to meet lots of interesting people. I'm sure it'll be very hot where I'm going. And even though it's going to be super-hot, I will be bundled up in clothes, barely showing any flesh. I only tell you that because I don't want you to worry about me getting sunburnt. Hef told me what you did, and I don't think it was very sisterly of you.

You are so vapid. Actually, I'm ingenious and philanthropic, and you're a backstabbing bitch. I hope everybody at the old folks' home is doing great.

And as for the Zeta girls, I'm sure they're doing fine. Oliver, I hope you think of me every once in a while, and when you do, I hope they are good thoughts. So we'll be half Shelley and half who we really are. I mean, say what you want about her, but the girl had style. I mean, she just wants to be back at the Playboy Mansion. Well, whatever we're gonna be, we need to figure out, you guys. We still need 30 pledges by October 15th, or we can just kiss it all goodbye.

Who wants to be a part of something real? Tell 29 of your friends. Zeta was founded on the tenets of sisterhood, friendship and philanthropy. Yeah, and since then, we've added some pretty kick-ass parties to the list. Yeah, but instead of judging and rejecting, we'll put all the pledges we get into a bowl, and we'll draw 30 names out. What'd you do to your hair? People have lots of different styles all over the world. In China, they usually tend to layer it, I've noticed.

This isn't China, though. You know, I could put it back to how it was. Well, I mean, you looked great before, with the hair. But, I mean, this feels more you.

The House Bunny - Wikiquote

I mean, besides, it's not like I want you to be my girlfriend just because of your hairstyle. I didn't mean to It's kind of presumptuous.

It's like, "Hey, you wanna be my girlfriend? Sit next to me. I mean, you don't want to be my girlfriend. You got guys falling from trees for you, and it's like Here I am, just a goofy dude. Colby, I want to be your girlfriend more than an electron wants to attach to a proton. Did I mess that up? Because I can do that so much better.

No, I was just thanking Shelley. We're gonna keep the Zeta house. Lilly, go mail the bids. Are you new on campus? I don't think we've ever met. Yes, I just transferred.